What is "snarky", you ask? I'll tell you.
The Urban Dictionary describes "Snarky" as, "A witty mannerism, personality, or behavior that is a combination of sarcasm and cynicism. Usually accepted as a complimentary term. Snark is sometimes mistaking for a snotty or arrogant attitude."
Now you know! And I bet you have someone in mind already, right? (Besides me, I mean.)
So here's my snark for today - whenever I'm enjoying my driving time, there will be someone to try to put a damper on it. And these people aren't just on the road - sometimes they are in a drive through lane. Like at the Post Office. This is the second time that I've been stuck behind vintage ladies who refuse to believe that this lane is there for anyone else. In fact, they stay so long I'm afraid they are actually waiting on the Postmaster himself to come out and collect their envelopes and double check their postage.
Last time the drive through lane at the Post Office was one ladies' "I'm-going-to-have-a-phone-conversation-here-with-my-window-open-and-pretend-I-don't-see-or-hear-you" lane. After "gently" revving my engine, and giving a few "polite" taps on my horn, she continues to talk on the phone, and STILL pretends not to see or hear me. My window is also down, so I comment, "Seriously!?! COME ON!" To which she shouts, "I'll move when I want to!" I feel badly for the person whose ear she shouted into on the other end of the phone. And for my daughter sitting next to me as I struggled to self censor.
Today, I am once again behind a vintage lady in the post office line. She's the kind who can't be seen from behind the car, and barely from the front, her hair-sprayed "do" barely clearing the dashboard. She was sitting there before I ever arrived, and when I finally pulled in behind her she hadn't moved, or deposited anything in the box. After a few moments, I once again gently revved my engine, but there was no movement from her car. No face appearing in the side or rear-view mirror, no hand snaking out with an envelope, nothing. So a polite tap on the horn, and nothing. By now (I hear the narrator on Sponge Bob saying, 'Seven days later', with that horrible French accent) there are other patrons behind me, so for the good of us all I gave a more firm tap on my horn. Still nothing. ... ... O. M. G.!!!! I decide my truck can clear the curb to go around her, so I exit my truck, and deposit my letter in the box just outside her car door, which immediately prompts a flurry of movement from the vintage one. Was she napping? By the time I'm back in my truck, she's deposited her envelope and has decided to move her car without my help. Which I hadn't fully committed to doing, but I guess seeing how large my grill looked in her rear view she thought I might help her car out of the lane. I know that in general people from previous generations are more polite and mannerly than us "young whipper snappers", so why, WHY do they feel the need to nap or converse in a drive through line? Just drop the envelope and move along, lady!
I'm not the most patient person in the world. On a scale of an Old West Quick Draw and Mother Teresa, I'm far closer to the gun end of the scale. I do try, I really do. But after a while I just can't think of any conceivable reason that someone would be holding up the line if they don't have a flat, a heart attack, or a dead battery, so all my willpower for patience goes right out the window.
I know better than to pray for patience. I'm just going to hope Santa can drop it off.
